“Do You Think It’s Cancer?”

Why does my doctor always ask me if I think something is cancer when I tell him about a new ache or pain?

“I’ve been getting piercing headaches after doing any strenuous exercise.”

“Do you think it’s cancer?”

“Lately I’ve been getting spasms in my right shin and foot when I go to sleep.”

“Do you think it’s cancer?”

“I broke my arm while cliff-jumping.”

“Do you think it’s cancer?”

No, I do not think it’s cancer. Should I think it’s cancer? Do I have cancer and you are afraid to tell me?  Oh man, I have cancer!!!

Just once I wish I really did have cancer so I could say to him “Yes, I think it’s cancer”. Then he would run tests and find out I really had cancer. I bet he’d feel stupid after that.

And, yes, I really would want cancer just to be able to say that. I am that committed to a good joke.

Then again, with my luck, that one time he’d ask me “Do you think it’s AIDS?” instead.

Bastard.

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